on seeking the legendary

haaaaaaaaiiiiiiihhhhhhhhhhhhh.

*deep breaths*

I've just spent many many many hours reviewing Malaysian students' application essays to the US. One of the bonuses for the 250 students that have been attending the US Apps 2009 workshop is that they get to submit their essays and CVs to us for review and much harsh guidance on their third day. It is strange how exhausted yet refreshed I feel after all this reading and typing :D I actually reckon I feel so refreshed because I'm getting to be really mean to people in a very legit way and it is quite satisfying. (oklah I'm really not being that mean, I criticize CONSTRUCTIVELY. really.)

Reading all the essays that have been submitted really made me realize how it was never a wonder that Malaysian students always did so badly in previous years when applying to the US. There was just always a lack of information and proper guidance for us - it's actually a miracle that I was even admitted in the first place. But being the activist idealists (yes we have been blogged about!) that we are, the Malaysian admits are finally making a huge effort to increase awareness of American education in the country. I could not be prouder of our efforts! :D Though due to lack of time I'm really only a small part of them. Chen Chow actually cried this morning when he woke up to see that every single essay that had been sent to us for review last night had nearly three comments each overnight - and by comments I do mean long, in-depth evaluations, though sometimes the temptation to leave them with a quote another facilitator, "BOOORRRRIIINNNGGG. your essay goes on and on about absolutely nothing of any significance at all and makes me physically ill. rewrite or go to hell. end" is very strong indeed. John Lee (from Dartmouth) actually managed to leave a comment for every single damn one. I have no idea if the man even slept last night. The current and future applicants to the US have no idea how lucky they actually are. (I feel like my mom and dad already. "you all ah got Facebook got Internet got Playstation you know we used to catch frogs in the drain you know how lucky you all are or not?!")

Little things like this make me believe that we are not doomed to fail as a society; and that one magical wonderful day we will break free and fly away our youth might just be able to save us from all the mistakes our forefathers have made. If we ever get rid of this oppression, I wonder who it will be that will have the first scream?


By the way, I don't think I've mentioned it, but very recently I came to the sad and sobering realization that I officially hate being Malaysian. I think it was sometime between receiving my JPA scholarship and reading about BTN camp and the death of Teoh Beng Hock. I'm disgusted at how the opposition parties so fervently promised and preached change when they wanted to be elected into office this year, but when Malaysians delivered and rejoiced in their victory, they proved to be the same type of poison under a different name. I also feel like I'm selling my soul to the government for the right to pursue my education, but I think I've mentioned that already. (BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS YOU.)

So sad. :'( *sniff*

i want to fly away
i want to live BIG.
someone pls take me <3

P.S. oh apparently today is Dom's birthday and my awesome friends in Sydney are making him complete 21 tasks in order to qualify as a mature 21-year-old so he is running around with posters asking people to vote for him in the next ERECTION (also something involving a pun on his name which is HO), waving flags that have been prepared for the same cause, also he is wearing his pants inside-out with his nails painted sparkly blue and asking people on the street to become his knights and maidens and join him in his quest and also he had to make out with a streetlamp. i am obviously out of the loop since i am on a different continent so i can't tell you what the other 16 things on the list are even though i very dearly wish i could. :( will i ever get to do something so legendary? and will i get to tell the world if i do?